Church Vandal Caught, Lost

Almost exactly a year ago, seven suburban churches here in Minnesota were vandalized with cryptic graffiti.

Well, have no fear, the police finally got their man – Malcolm Eric Johns, a 36-year-old anarchist who admits to hating religion.

Johns – who has previous convictions in Minnesota for damage to property and careless driving – apparently decided that court wasn’t worth showing up for today, meaning he can add “failure to appear” to his growing list of charges.

Not that he’s trying terribly hard to hide, mind; the Star Tribune apparently reached him without difficulty at his parents’ home, where he stated his disgust with the planet, and expressed a desire for law enforcement to kill him.

I eagerly anticipate the local anarchist community’s response to this, and their convoluted explanations about how Mr. Johns was framed/entrapped/railroaded/beaten into confessing his involvement in what should, inevitably, be a protected first-amendment activity. Dude, solidarity and stuff, amirite?

It looks like Johns might have lived in Atlanta for a couple years, which makes me wonder if there are any unsolved church graffiti cases down there…

Published in: 'D' for 'Dumb' | on June 16th, 2011| No Comments »

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